To You

Dearest Friend,

I know you want to be full of peace and content with where you are.  And I know that you want to be used solely and wholly for God’s Kingdom.  You want your life’s work to be so distinctly set apart for Him, so unique but so normal — normal for a lover of Christ, that is.  You want to be used, spent, given purpose.

But right now there are daily tasks that seem utterly meaningless.  Washing clothes and cleaning the bathroom — maybe those are meaningful,  being a good steward and thanking Him for what He’s given.  But what about filing papers?  What about the tedious things that seem to have nothing to do with Kingdom work?  How do you view these things as purposeful, things that actually matter?  Do they matter?

It seems like you’re wasting time.  You’re wanting more.  You want to make a difference, show Christ to someone, be able to stand before God and say that your life was worthwhile.  Yes, you messed up; yes, there were opportunities you didn’t take advantage of.  And maybe you’re wishing you could have those opportunities now, some way to pour yourself out.  But you’re stuck in that job with those people and those tasks and the rut grows deeper and deeper while your desire grows stronger and stronger.

From my heart, I sympathize with you.  I’ve had a taste of full-time, life’s-work ministry, and there’s nothing else I want as badly.  I’m working with Trades of Hope as a means of staying connected to missions in this time of waiting for God’s next step.  It is inspiring and fantastic, and I’m restless.  I want to be on the other side, with the women making the earrings and baskets and bags.  I want to get my hands dirty.  Think twice about drinking water from the tap.  Drive an hour with a van full of kids to get food from the market.  Fall into bed at the end of the day knowing that I was spent beyond my human capacity for the Name of Jesus.

Yet that’s not where I am right now.  And God has gently reminded me that I can choose to be okay with this here and now, or I can choose to go out of my mind and be miserable.  The latter would in fact be wasting time.  He reminded me that the little things matter.  Diligently filing papers matters.  Answering phone calls and ending with a “God bless” matters.  Picking up trash on the floor matters.  Smiling to customers matters.  {Imagine if no one did these things!}

“[God] ‘will render to each one according to his deeds’ eternal life to those who by patient continuance in doing good seek for glory, honor, and immortality; but to those who are self-seeking and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness—indignation and wrath, tribulation and anguish, on every soul of man who does evil, of the Jew first and also of the Greek; but glory, honor, and peace to everyone who works what is good, to the Jew first and also to the Greek.”

Romans 2:6-10

I hope you take immense comfort in those verses.  God promises that no deed will go overlooked.  He counts the small things, even when you think they’re far too miniscule to matter.  He sees your heart, which is what matters.  And He loves you with the same crazy love whether you do a good deed or not.  Keep walking in faith, keep being faithful in the little things.  Remember that story Jesus told?  The parable of the talents; being faithful with the little things He gives.  “His lord said to him,  ‘Well done, good and faithful servant; you have been faithful over a few things, I will make you ruler over many things.  Enter into the joy of your lord’” (Matthew 25:23).

The joy of the Lord is your strength to go on, to praise, to be a blessing.  Stick to the course, and the next time Satan reminds you of your past, remind him of his future.

With much love,

Your sister in Christ

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